


Child

by madsinwonderland



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Darth Vader's undiagnosed parental anxiety, Gen, Internal Conflict, Leia becomes a sith in training, Luke becomes a sith in training, Parent Darth Vader, Vader takes custody of Leia, Vader takes custody of Luke, leia skywalker - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:15:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 19,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22781614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madsinwonderland/pseuds/madsinwonderland
Summary: During a summit, a young child peaks Vader's interest. When Vader discovers that Leia is his daughter, it becomes his sole purpose in life to make her his, and to rule the galaxy as father and daughter.
Relationships: Leia Organa & Darth Vader, Leia Organa & Luke Skywalker, Luke Skywalker & Darth Vader
Comments: 69
Kudos: 94





	1. Past life

Vader hated the senate. He hated anytime that he had to attend, which luckily wasn’t often. He was there merely to keep an eye on things, unfortunately it was a summit lasting several days. He wasn’t too thrilled about that. The voices of senators all blended into one voice that sounded warbled and distorted. He was lucky that if he closed his eyes, no one could see behind his black raspatory mask. Vader didn’t understand why he had to attend. Everyone was remaining civil enough for his liking and everything being discussed Vader and the Empire was already aware of. It was the Emperor’s bidding that he be there, and he does what ever her tells him to do. He wished that the Emperor would let him do his own thing, but he was his master after all. His time would come where he will overthrow the Emperor.

When the senate adjourned for the day, it took all of his self-control (which he had very little of) to not cheer in delight. He had an office in the senate which he retired in for the rest of the evening. As he walked down each corridor to get to his office he had a feeling that he was being followed, but every time he quickly looked over his shoulder, he saw nobody. It wasn’t until he reached the door of his office that he heard the laughter of a young child. He hasn’t spent much time around children since he was Anakin, the sound was unnerving to him. He turned around and saw a young girl playing with the hem of his cape. He had walked a long way through door less corridors, she must have come from the senate. The little girl plopped herself down on the floor and looked up at him. She had big brown eyes and big brown curls. She was dressed in very elegant attire, clearly, she was the daughter of one of the senators. Normally when children see him they run away in horror, but not this little girl.

Vader was enthralled by this young child. He couldn’t quite tell why, but there was something that captivated him about the girl. He towered over the young girl, yet she didn’t run away. Instead she smiled at him, and her laughter echoed in the corridor.

This child gave Vader the feeling that he had seen her before. There was something about the features of her face that were so familiar to him, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. He didn’t want to leave the child alone, so he brought her into his office and she climbed onto a seat in the corner. In an effort to find the young child’s identity, he summoned a stormtrooper into his chambers. When the Stormtrooper entered the room, he was taken aback by the small child in the room.

“Who is she sir?” The trooper asked.

“That’s what I want you to find out.” Vader instructed. He stood in the corner and watched as the Stormtrooper interacted with the child. The young girl didn’t seem as happy to be around him and kept glancing up at Vader. The trooper managed to scan her and pulled up her identification.

“Her name is Princess Leia Organa of Alderaan, Lord Vader. She is the daughter of Queen Breha Organa and Bail Organa. She’s three years old.” The trooper informed him. The number stuck in his head. Three. Three years ago, he became Darth Vader.

“Return her to her parents.” Vader ordered. The trooper tried to grab the girl’s hand, but an ear-piercing shriek came from the young girl. She ran past the trooper and wrapped her arms around Vader’s mechanical leg. _Why was she afraid of the stormtrooper, but not the me?_ Vader thought to himself. Reluctantly, he walked the girl back to the senate room himself. She babbled to herself and held onto his cape. He felt this bond with the young girl, but that was impossible. He had never seen her before, and the only offspring of his former self died with Padme. But could it be? The timeline’s added up.

At the entrance of the senate, Bail Organa and Queen Breha were in a panic, ordering stormtroopers to find their missing daughter. In the senate of all places, where her real father could find her. When Vader and Leia emerged, relief spread across their faces. However, it quickly turned to horror when they found out who she was with. The queen quickly scooped up her daughter and held her tight.

“She seemed to follow me to my chambers.” Vader snapped. “Keep a better eye on your child senator.”

“Of course, Lord Vader.” Bail nodded. Vader returned to his office, but the little girl was still in his mind.

The end of the week couldn’t come fast enough for Vader. He was ready to leave the senate and Coruscant and continue the work of overlooking the development of the Death Star. As he stared out of the star destroyer out in space, he thought of the child again. The three-year-old girl who had features with a striking resemblance with memories from his past life.

“Admiral.” Vader barked. “Pull up the identification of Leia Organa of Alderaan.”

The admiral pulled up the child’s identification on a computer screen, and sure enough the same feeling of familiarity overcame his senses. He read the information on the young girl. Adopted, he read.

_Adopted?_ He felt his heart beating hard inside of him. Suddenly he realised where he recognized those features. They were his own. She was his. His head was spinning. Millions of thoughts were spinning around his mind.

If she was his daughter, that means the Emperor lied to him.

“Anything of importance to you?” Admiral Vullen asked Vader.

“No.” Vader lied and marched off to find the Emperor. The Emperor was on the Star Destroyer, he had come to do some training with Vader. Vader threw the doors of the Emperors quarters open with a bang.

“You lied to me master.” Vader barked.

“Watch your tone Lord Vader.” The Emperor croaked.

“You told me that my offspring died with Padme.” Vader roared.

“It was Anakin’s offspring.” The Emperor said. Anger was bubbling in Vader’s veins. He ignited his lightsaber and held it by his side.

“I thought the child died with Padme. I told you what I thought was true.” The Emperor was beginning to get nervous. He knew exactly how powerful Vader could be when he was angry.

“Liar!” Vader’s mask hissed. He lunged at the Emperor, but the Emperor was quick enough to ignite his own saber and block Vader’s attack.

“You won’t win the battle.” The Emperor cackled.

“That’s where your wrong.” Vader snarled. The dark room was filled with bright red flashes as the lightsabers clashed together. They battled for hours, until the Emperor grew tired. He couldn’t keep up with the young Vader who was mostly machine. Vader had pinned against the wall with the lightsaber mere millimeters away from him.

“Spare me, please. I beg you.” The Emperor pleaded with Vader.

“Not this time.” Vader sliced the Emperor in half, the lightsaber carving through his body like butter. With the Emperor gone, a realization overcame Vader. He was now the most powerful being in the galaxy. Everyone had to answer to him.

He strode through the halls of the Star Destroyer.

“Admiral Vullen. Set course for the Alderaan system.” Vader ordered.

“My Lord-” Vullen began.

“Orders are orders Admiral.” Vader said forcefully. “Inform the queen that I will be expecting them to meet me when I arrive, including the child.”

“We have to check with the Emperor.” Vullen said hesitantly.

“I’m your Emperor now.” Vader stormed off, ready to bring his daughter home.

On Alderaan, Queen Breha and Bail Organa were in a panic.

“We could hide her.” Bail sighed.

“No, Vader said that Leia had to be there too.” Breha whispered.

“Why does he want her to be there?” Bail asked himself.

“Isn’t it obvious? He didn’t have any interest in her before she ran off with him in the senate. He knows, he has to know.” Breha cried.

“We’ll double, triple security.” Bail spat. “I’m not letting that masked monster lay his mechanical hand on our daughter.”

“He’ll be here soon, we’d better get Leia ready.” Breha’s voice was shaking.

“I’ll gather the guards.” Bail muttered. Breha watched as the handmaidens prepared Leia. She watched on through tears in her eyes.

“He’s here!” Bail shouted from the landing platform. Breha picked up Leia and took to the platform to wait for Vader’s arrival. Leia could see the tears in her mother’s eyes. The young girl was beginning to feel frightened. There were rows upon rows of guards lining the platform, more than she had ever seen before.

“Stay close to me Leia.” Bail whispered to her. Leia gripped his hand tight. Bail, Breha, and Leia stood on the platform as Vader’s ship prepared to land. There was a release of steam, before Vader walked down the ramp. Vader looked at the child. He saw it even clearer now. She looked just like Padme with a few features of himself.

“We must talk alone, perhaps in your chambers?” Vader announced.

“No, the communications must happen out here.” Bail said quickly, moving Leia behind him.

“I warn you senator, a few of your guards are no match for the power of the empire.” Vader growled. Bail nodded and let Vader inside. Vader told the stormtroopers not to follow, and it was just the four of them in the chambers.

“What can we do for you Lord Vader?” Breha said carefully.

“Your daughter, Leia, on her identification it says that you have adopted her.” Vader began.

“Yes, we don’t keep her adoption hidden.” Breha tried to speak clearly, and not let her fear get in the way, she was the Queen after all.

“But not openly talk about.” Vader added. “Her name? Is it a royal name?”

“No, Leia’s biological mother named her.”

“What became of her mother?”

“Leia’s mother died after she was born.”

“And her father?” Vader asked the two.

“Her father died during the Clone Wars.” Bail said as if it had been rehearsed. Leia sat on the floor and watched the adults talk. Her eyes followed each one of them. Brimming with curiosity.

“The child is mine.” Vader bellowed.

“Leia’s father was Anakin Skywalker, not the monster that you have become.” Bail snapped.

“The child is mine.” Vader said again. “I will be taking the child into my custody. I expect you to pack up her things, and I will see you back on the platform.”

“No! I won’t let you take her.” Bail shouted. Vader used the force to grab his throat. Slowly tightening his grip and chocking him.

“Let go of him!” Breha exclaimed. Vader released his grip but held up his hand to warn them that he would do it again.

“The child, senator. I demand that she is on my ship immediately. If you don’t do it yourself, my troopers will do it themselves. They will use any force necessary, disastrous, if it comes to it. I will hurt the child if you don’t hand her over. Get her to my ship.” Vader marched to the front of his ship, and watched the Organa’s say goodbye to Leia. One of the handmaidens was carrying a box, which Vader presumed was her possessions.

“Release her.” Vader demanded. Breha and Bail gave her one last hug. They told her that they loved her. They watched in horror as she ran to Vader and wrapped her small arms around his mechanical leg. Vader and Leia, followed by the stormtroopers, walked up the ramp of the space shuttle. Vader personally buckled Leia into her seat. He had the responsibilities of a father now, and he made a promise to himself that he would be a damn good one. As the shuttle lifted off, Vader turned to his daughter.

“I’m your father.” He said to her. She nodded. He wanted to wipe the traits of the Organa’s from her. She was his daughter, and he wanted to make sure she knew it. He was no longer Anakin Skywalker, that was a past life. However, Leia too was apart of that same past life.

_“And you my child, your name is Leia Skywalker.”_


	2. Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vader learns what it means to be a father.

Leia watched in awe at the stars around her. For a three-year-old, she was extremely curious. Fatherhood hit Vader like a ton of bricks. He watched as the small child tried to unbuckle herself and felt himself fill with anxiety.

“Leia, you need to stay buckled. It’s to keep you safe.” Vader said.

“You’re not.” Leia pouted. Vader sighed, and did up the buckle on his seat. It was too tight for him, however it seemed to satisfy his daughter who was happily looking out the window of the shuttle. The shuttle drew closer and closer to the _Executor_ , Vader’s personal star destroyer. Leia had never seen a star destroyer up close before, let alone be inside one. She held Vader’s hand as they walked through the harshly lit corridors of the _Executor_ together. They walked to the bridge, where you could view the foundations of the Death Star being built.

“What’s that?” Leia looked up to her father with big brown eyes.

“That, child, is your legacy. The Death Star will one day be the most powerful weapon in the galaxy, and it will one day belong to you.” Vader was proud to see the Death Star coming together. He was even prouder to share it with his daughter. He had only known about her existence for a short while, yet she was the most important thing in the galaxy to him. She was all Vader had left of Padme. He heard a small gasp come from the child.

“Admiral Vullen.” Vader called out over the bridge.

“Yes, Lord Vader?” The admiral responded.

“Are Leia’s quarters ready?” Vader asked.

“Yes sir.” Vullen reported, eager to keep Vader happy. Vader tried to move off, but Leia was transfixed by the Death Star. It was unlike anything she had seen before.

“Leia, we’ll come back to look at it. Now, we are going to our quarters.”

Snapping out of her trance, she followed Vader along the corridor, running to keep up with his large strides.

“Slow down!” Leia giggled. Vader wasn’t used to having a child around. The last time he was around a child, as Anakin, was when he was assisting in one of Yoda’s youngling classes. He slowed down his pace and walked slowly alongside his daughter.

“I like this ship.” Leia said observantly. “It’s very different to daddy’s ship.”

Vader stopped in his tracks and felt as if a lightsaber was lodged in his chest. Organa was not her father. Vader was. He tried to tell himself that she was still adjusting. She was the daughter of the most powerful man in the galaxy, but she was still only a little girl. He tried his best to crouch down to her level, but with his mechanical limbs, it made it difficult.

“Leia, remember. I am your father. Bail Organa is not.”

Leia nodded.

“You’re my father.” She said aloud to herself. Vader stood himself up and they continued to walk to her quarters. Outside the door, two stormtroopers were standing guard. Vader ordered that two storm troopers be guarding the door at all time, even if she was not inside. Inside the room, it wasn’t as harsh as the rest of the star destroyer. The light was softer in the room. A bed sat next to a side wall and a large window was on the main wall. On the bed, laid on the pillow, was a doll. Leia lunged for doll and held her tight. Vader closed the door behind him. Leia sat on the floor and played with the doll. Vader sat on the bed and watched her play.

“Why do you wear that helmet?” Leia asked her father.

“I need it to breathe.” Vader’s mask susurrated.

“Why?” She persisted. Flashbacks of his battle with Obi-Wan entered his mind. The flashes of blue and the hum of lightsabers chill him to his core. He will never forget the feeling of his body burning from the heat of the fire. _You were my brother Anakin_ , Obi-Wan’s voice still haunts him. He lost the people he loved that day. He’ll never forget it.

“A bad man did bad things to me.” He said at last. _How do you tell a child that your limbs were sliced off and you were left to die by lava?_ He thought to himself. Vader noticed that Leia’s eyes were drooping. He scooped her up and tucked her into bed. Her first night with him. The first time he would ever tuck her in. He had to get it just right, there would never be another first tucking in. He pulled the blankets up to her chin. He went to walk away, but Leia’s hand wrapped around his mechanical pinkie.

“I love you daddy.” Leia murmured as she drifted off to sleep. To hear that come from his daughter made his heart feel full. He sat on the edge of her bed and let her fall into a deep sleep. When he heard a soft snoring come from Leia, he careful pulled his finger from Leia’s grasp. He tried his best to creep out of the room, but his heavy mechanical boots made loud clanking noises. He was lucky, however that Leia remained asleep.

Vader wanted to retire to his chambers, however, he had a lot of work to catch up on. Spending time with Leia proved to be more time consuming than Vader had thought, but he wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Most importantly, was for him to work on his Sith training. He killed Palpatine, yet he still had a lot to learn. He’d now have to teach himself. His training proved tiresome. As he made his way to his quarters after he was done for the day, he thought to himself about bringing Leia into the force. She was strong in the force. He could feel it. He felt it that first day that he met her, and he feels it even stronger now _. I shall teach her the ways of the force_ , he said to himself. When he entered his meditation chambers, he took off his helmet. He had mixed emotions about the process. It was a moment of freedom for him. It was heavy and taking it off was freeing. Even though it was freeing, it made breathing rather difficult, although he did adjust. He felt himself begin to drift into a sleep like meditation, when he felt the presence of someone outside his chambers. Vader quickly lowered the helmet before addressing the officer.

“Yes?” His mask hissed.

“Your daughter is crying for you.” The officer said warily. Vader marched right past the officers. He strode down the hallway, fearing that there was something wrong. As he got closer and closer to Leia’s room, he could hear her cry. It was the first time he had ever heard her cry, and it scared him like nothing else had in the past. When he entered her room, Vader found Leia sitting up in her bed. Her face was red and scrunched up.

“What happened?” He asked her in the gentlest voice he could muster through his mask.

“I had a bad dream.” Leia sobbed.

“What about?”

“A bad man tried to take me away.” She sniffled. She crawled into his lap and curled up to his chest. He wasn’t sure what to do, so he wrapped his arms around her and it felt right. He heard her whimper a little more before her breathing slowed. He put her back to bed and tucked her in again, this time a little tighter and returned to his meditation chamber.

When he awoke next, he felt well rested. His first day in fatherhood and he felt confident that he was doing well. He had too, he didn’t have any other chances.

He walked up to her quarters. He found her on the floor, playing with her doll. Her eyes lit up when she saw Vader in the door.

“Can we eat?” Was the first thing she said to him. Vader nodded and led her off to the eating quarters. As they walked, Leia skipped along side him. An officer served up Leia a plate of flatcakes.

“Did you have any other dreams while you slept?” Vader asked Leia once they were seated at a table.

“I had a dream where I saw my family.” Leia said. “I saw my mommy. She told me her name was Padme.”

Vader was stunned by hearing her name come from his daughter’s lips.

“Who told you your mother’s name?” Vader asked her.

“Mommy did! Last night.” Leia said in annoyance. “She told me that she was a senator and that her name was Padme and that she loved me. She also took me to see my brother. His name is Luke Skywalker.”

Brother? He tried to think logically. She was a child, and she had a dream. But it wasn’t just any dream, Padme came to her.

“Where was your brother?” Vader felt his heart beating hard inside him.

“I don’t remember. I just remember seeing two suns.” Leia was beginning to stuff her tiny face with her breakfast.

Tatooine. They were hiding his sons on Tatooine. A clever place to hide him. Tatooine brought nothing but pain and suffering to his memories. A slave as a child and forced to watch his mother die in his arms as an adult.

Tatooine is not a place he ever expected to go back too, but now that he knew he had another child, he would be right on his way.

“We’re going to find your brother.” Vader sighed. He scooped up Leia and held her in his arms. He marched right to the bridge.

“Admiral set course for the Tatoo system.” Vader ordered.

“What ever for, Lord Vader?” Admiral Vullen replied, getting almost to cocky for Vader’s liking.

“No questions asked. Just do it.” Vader barked. Admiral did as he was told, and the _Executor_ made its way to Tatooine.


	3. Promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vader goes off to find his son.

Anakin had made a promise to himself that he would never return to Tatooine. He was breaking that promise as Vader. Tatooine left his mind as scarred his physical body. He was a father, and he had another child to take back. He wasn’t looking forward to returning to Tatooine, but his feelings of anger were far stronger than any of his other feelings.

How dare anyone take his children away from him. How dare anyone try to hide them from him. The anger was boiling inside of him.

They made a jump to hyperspace as Tatooine was in the outer rim. Vader gently sat Leia on the floor. He had work that he had to do, regardless of the fact that he now was responsible for a child. He was requested in a meeting about the Death Star. Meetings, he hated meetings. In his opinion, there was no greater waste of time. He didn’t find meetings to accomplish anything, if you wanted to accomplish things, just go out and do it. He sat Leia on a chair outside of the meeting room.

“Don’t move.” He told his daughter, who nodded her head and continued to play with her doll. He forgot how children found the simplest of things amusing and prayed that it would be enough to keep her satisfied.

Inside the meeting it was announced that the construction of the death star would have to be delayed, again, which only fueled Vader’s anger. They were having trouble sourcing the materials for the rest of the foundations. The galaxy was oblivious to the construction which meant something else the Empire had to keep a hold on.

The meeting went on and on. All Vader wanted to do was get his son and leave. When he heard the words meeting adjourned he was the first leave the room. Vader was pleasantly surprised to see Leia sitting in the chair where he had left her, yet he was even more shocked to see a stormtrooper sitting next to her. On the day that Vader and Leia first met, Leia was very afraid of the stormtroopers. In fact, she had been too afraid to speak to any of the imperial officers and stormtroopers. She was giggling to the stormtrooper. When the stormtrooper saw Vader looking at the two of them, he almost jumped out of his skin.

“I’m sorry Lord Vader, she looked lonely and I thought I would keep her company.” The trooper babbled on.

“Remove you helmet.” Vader ordered. The storm trooper did what was told of him. Beneath the helmet, the man was rather young. He had short blonde hair bright green eyes.

“What’s your name?” Vader’s mask hissed.

“RW-938 sir.” The trooper announced.

‘Your name.” Vader snapped impatiently.

“Nick Qualon.” He said. He wasn’t used to saying him name, he had become a number to the Empire. He wasn’t worth anything to them.

“Thank you, Nick Qualon. This won’t be the last time that we speak.”

The trooper was confused but returned his helmet to his head and quickly made his way towards his station. Vader never thanked anyone. Nick had no idea what Vader meant or what he had in store for him. It made him feel a little scared inside, but he didn’t dare show it.

“I like him. He was nice.” Leia giggled.

“Lord Vader!” Admiral Vullen ran after Vader. “We have arrived on Tatooine.”

“Get my shuttle ready and makes sure there are two seats appropriate for children.” Vader ordered.

“Two?” Vullen clarified.

“Did it sound like a made a mistake?” Vader barked.

“Not at all Lord Vader, your shuttle will be ready immediately” Vullen replied, cursing Leia under his breath because she is making his job harder.

Holding Leia’s hand, Vader made his way to the bridge. Below them was the sandy planet that brought nothing but pain and suffering.

“Ow!” Leia squealed. Vader looked down to see that he was holding Leia in a grip so hard that her hand was turning purple. _How dare they take his son there._ Vader thought to himself angrily. _How dare they make him return with his daughter who he wished would never have to know of this awful place._

“This looks like the place from my dream.” Leia said.

“Your shuttle, Lord Vader.” An officer declared. Vader took Leia back to the loading platform. The first time that Leia was buckled into her seat, she didn’t put up a fight. However, this time she fussed anytime Vader got the buckle near her. This was the first time that Leia was making Vader cross. She screamed and cried. Vader didn’t understand why she put up such a struggle, it wasn’t hurting her.

“Stop screaming!” Vader hissed. “I’ll leave you on the ship by yourself!”

Some of the imperial officers in the shuttle sent disapproving glances his way. Vader felt an immense deal of pressure under their watchful eyes. After hearing an exasperated sigh coming from an officer near the front, Vader exploded.

“What? Do you all have children? Do you know how hard it is?” Vader demanded. Majority of the officers nodded their heads. The pressure doubled.

“How did he get laid?” An officer in the back muttered to himself. Vader wanted to strangle the life out of him. However, he was a father now and he didn’t want Leia to see do something like that.

“Please stop, Leia! Please!” Vader begged. He finally managed to get the young girl into the buckle. Leia pouted with her arms crossed when she realised that she had the lost. Vader breathed a sigh of relief. Leia was safe, and she had stopped screaming.

The shuttle was able to leave the platform and drift closer and closer to Tatooine. Tatooine was a big planet, how would he find a small boy?

“Do you remember how you found your brother?” Vader asked Leia.

“We went to a town and then we went straight. He was living with people that were farmers.” Leia babbled. Farmers? It suddenly clicked in his head. Vader’s son was staying with his step brother.

On the moisture farm, there was panic. Beru had spotted an imperial star destroyer parked over Tatooine.

“Owen!” Beru called out over the farm. “Owen!”

Owen was out by a vaporator, Luke was watching him. Both the suns were shining bright that day. The noise of the vaporator drowned out the noise of Beru and it wasn’t until Obi-Wan started running towards him that he noticed.

“What are you doing here?” Owen hissed. “I told you to stay away from us.”

“The empire is on it’s way. A shuttle was spotted only a few minutes away.” Obi-Wan panted. All the colour drained from his face. Before Luke knew what was happening, Owen scooped him up and hid him in the speeder.

Out of fear that the Empire would find Luke, Owen and Beru practiced what to do if need be. Hiding Luke in the speeder proved to be the best idea. Luke knows that he has to stay in the speeder until Beru comes and gets him. They hoped that it would never have to happen, that they would never have to do the drills for real.

Obi-Wan ran and hid. If the Vader knew that he was there, it would spell danger not only for him, but for Luke, as well as Owen and Beru.

The shuttle parked only a short distance away from them. Beru said a silent pray that Luke would stay quiet. He was a curious child however he did as he was told. Owen and Beru never expected Vader to be walking towards them, let alone holding the hand of a small girl the same age as Luke.

Owen and Beru were a few of the only people in the galaxy that knew of Vader’s true identity, informed by Obi-Wan of course.

“Lord Vader. How can we help you?” Beru tried to sound confident but couldn’t help her voice quivering.

“You have my son.” Vader bellowed.

“Your son? I didn’t know you had a son. He’s definitely not here, but we’ll let you know if we find him.” Beru lied.

“This looks like the house from my dream.” Leia gasped, and Vader knew he was in the right place.

“What do you want Anakin?” Owen snapped. Vader couldn’t control himself in front of Leia anymore. He choked Owen with the force with Beru screaming at him to stop. Leia watched on, frozen in fear.

“Daddy?” Leia said in a small voice. Vader looked down to see the horror in his daughter’s eyes. He released Owen and immediately scooped up Leia in his arms. Leia sobbed and wrapped her arms around Vader’s helmet. Guilt overwhelmed Vader. How could he call himself a father?

Looking over Vader’s shoulder, Leia was to see inside the speeder. Luke had perched himself up when he heard Leia crying. Leia stopped crying and started shrieking.

“I found him!” Leia squealed. Vader put Leia down and she ran towards the speeder. Luke jumped out and the two ran towards each other. Beru was yelling at Luke to hide, but he wasn’t listening.

“It seems that your effort to keep him from me has failed. I will be taking him back into my custody.” Vader announced.

“You can’t!” Beru sobbed.

“You took my son away from me, you’re lucky this is all I’m doing.”

Suddenly, Vader felt a disturbance in the force, one that he had not felt since Obi-Wan. A figure was running closer and closer to the group. Vader soon realised that it was his old master. When Obi-Wan removed his hood. He looked older than he was. His hair was full of greys and more wrinkles were spread across his face. He had the same look in his eye that he had on Mustafar, a look of hopelessness and anguish.

Inside Vader, his emotions were bubbling. He felt a pang of anger. The man who took everything from him, his limbs, his wife, and now his children was standing right in front of him. A feeling of hatred was short lived and filled with what Vader could only describe as grief. Vader missed the man he used to be. Being evil and the most feared man in the galaxy was not a life he ever imagined for himself. He missed his master that was like a father to Anakin in his early years and then became his brother. He missed Padme. He missed being able to breathe normally. His life now was lonely. Nobody really cared about him, not like Padme and Obi-Wan had. Now he could fill that void with Leia and Luke, he didn’t need anyone else. Anakin was gone and there was no way that he could be brought back. He was Vader now.

“Time has not been kind to you.” Vader observed the man standing in front of him.

“You found the girl.” Obi-Wan said sadly, knowing his last mission as a Jedi had failed. The one thing that he had left for him in life had failed.

“You were wrong to hide her from me.” Vader barked.

“Kill me and leave to boy. I know that’s what you really want.” Obi-Wan begged. “Please, let the boy go, and the girl.”

“If that’s what you think I’m after then your wrong. I’m here for my son.” Vader spat. “Claiming your life will be nothing but a reward to me.”

Vader was shocked at the words that had come out of his mouth. He didn’t want Obi-Wan dead, but if he came between Vader and his son, Vader would do anything to stop him.

“Leia, get your brother and get onto my ship. Leia held Luke by the hand and began to walk towards the shuttle. Unlike Leia, who happily left with Vader when it was her turn, Luke ran back to Owen and Beru and sobbed.

“He wants to stay with us.” Owen shouted.

“If you don’t put the boy on my ship, he will never see the light of day again.” Vader threatened. Vader knew that he would never do anything like that to Luke, but Owen and Beru didn’t know that. They walked both the children up to the shuttle, so it was just Vader and Obi-Wan standing at the foot of the ramp. Vader ignited his lightsaber and held it by his side, very much expecting Obi-Wan to do the same.

“This will be your last fight.” Vader growled. Obi-Wan continued to stare Vader down. Calmly he took a step closer to Vader.

“Strike me down, and I’ll be more powerful than you could ever dream of being.” Obi-Wan said gently. Vader waved his lightsaber around in an attempt to get Obi-Wan to bring out his own. Obi-Wan continued to stand still.

“Your loss.” Vader snarled and cut the lightsaber right through his old master. Instead of his body becoming to pieces, he simply vanished. His robe falling to a crumbled heap on the floor. Vader stood for a moment at a loss for words. Was Obi-Wan really dead. Everything had moved so quickly that Vader hadn’t had time to fully comprehend everything that had happened, or what he was doing. He stood in shock for a moment before he finally snapped out of whatever trance he was in. That was one more Jedi gone. He marched up the ramp to see that Luke and Leia were playing on the floor. Owen and Beru were standing by the entrance.

“Leave us now, you are no longer needed.” Vader demanded. Beru gave Luke one last hug goodbye, promising him that it wouldn’t be the last time they saw each other. Vader buckled both Leia and Luke into the seats. This time Leia didn’t protest so much after she saw that Luke was buckled calmly.

Luke didn’t know what was happening, he didn’t understand.

“Luke, I am your father. This is Leia, your sister.” Vader tried to talk gently to the boy.

“My daddy is dead.” Luke said quietly.

“No, he’s not.” Leia interrupted. “That’s our daddy.”

As Luke looked up at him, Vader could see the likeness between his old self and the boy. He saw Anakin in the boy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone reading! I was extremely nervous to post this work as it was the first one in this fandom and I have had such kind words and feedback. Thank you so much, these comments really make my day, especially in this day and age where I've been stressed out by the whole COVID-19 situation.


	4. Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A year on from having the children back in his life.

Vader was watching his children intently. Leia was proving to be extremely bossy, whilst Luke was very shy. The children were drawing, with Vader watching over them. Leia was hoarding most of the crayons, and anytime Luke went for one she didn’t have, she would swipe it from him.

If Leia’s behavior wasn’t directed towards her brother, he’d be proud. However, she was teasing her brother. He didn’t want that for his children. He didn’t grow up with siblings. He knew how lonely it was to be an only child, he wanted nothing more for his children than to be close. It hurt him inside that they weren’t getting along.

“Leia, share with your brother.” Vader growled.

“No, I’m using them.” Leia mumbled, and Vader observed the lump that was growing in her sleeve.

“It’s okay, she can use them. I’ll watch.” Luke said quietly. These two children were vastly different. They had come from different homes. Leia was raised as a princess and Luke a farm boy. To get them to go along would take time and patience, neither of which were Vader’s strong suits.

He never realised how much work raising a child was. He was glad that he took them back, he didn’t regret that, not for a single moment. But Fatherhood was hard, he didn’t have any help.

“No, Leia share.” Vader growled. It had been almost a year since Vader took back his children. The two of them had a problem bonding. They still acted as if they had just met.

Vader had hope that by training them in the force would bring them closer together. It was working, partially.

The twins were just days off turning 4. They both had lightsabers, similar in design with their father’s. Both of the children were powerful in the force. Luke was more in touch with the force than Leia. He enjoyed his time training more than Leia did.

“I think that’s enough time coloring children.” Vader said and gently picked up the Twin’s lightsabers. He led them to a room at the end of the _Executor_. It was a room that had been dedicated to the twins Sith training. He handed the lightsabers to each child and pulled out his own.

“Activate your lightsabers children.” Vader commanded, and Vader did the same. The room was filled with the hum of lightsabers and a red glow.

“Remember, be very careful. Lightsabers are very dangerous.” Vader warned. He wanted the children to wear protective gear when handling the lightsabers, remembering the many times he had lost limbs to a lightsaber. However, he never learnt with protective gear, so they wouldn’t need it either.

“Luke.” Leia giggled and almost poked him with the lightsaber.

“Leia!” Luke screeched and hid behind his father.

“Leia!” Vader boomed. “What did I tell you?”

“Sorry father.” She mumbled. Vader sighed and returned Luke to his position. He set up each child with a remote and watched them deflect each blast. They had only done been working on their Sith abilities for a year, but already they were very skilled. Vader told himself it was because they had inherited his power. He prided himself on it. Being a successful father was important to him.

Luke was deflecting every blast however, Leia wasn’t. She got hit a few times. Luckily the twin’s tunics were made specially as to dull the pain a little, only leaving a bit of shock.

“I don’t think I’m going to be a Sith.” Leia grumbled.

“Of course, you will. You just need to practice.” Vader sighed.

“The Organa’s were senators. I want to be one.” Leia’s eyes were shining.

“No, you will not be a senator. You are a Sith, just follow me.” Vader activated his lightsaber along side Leia and tried to show her a few moves in a desperate attempt to distract her from the Organa’s. Vader tried so hard to wipe the Organa’s from her memory by distracting her with her new life, however she kept coming back to the Organa’s and Alderaan.

He noticed that the children were getting tired, so he ended training for the day and made heir way towards the dining room. There, they met Nick. Vader was right, it wasn’t the last time they would see each other. Vader promoted Nick to be a guardian towards Luke and Leia. He watched over them when Vader couldn’t and put them to bed.

“Are you staying for dinner?” Luke asked Vader.

“No, I need to go to work. The Empire doesn’t run itself.” Vader marched off towards the direction of the bridge. He wished he could be around the twins more. It pained him that he couldn’t be around them as much. He told himself he was doing this work so that he can provide a future for his children.

He was watching over the work of the Death Star. They were finally able to continue construction after months of searching for the right materials.

The Death Star was a symbol for him, a symbol of how far he’s come. From a slave boy on Tatooine with nothing but dreams to his name and no future in front of him, to a Jedi padawan being underestimated and being made to look like a fool on the council, to the most powerful being in the galaxy with two children.

After hours of observation and dealing with imperial officers, he decided that it was time to retire to his chambers. He walked the halls of his ship but stopped once he reached the door of the twins. They were each sleeping peacefully. On the end of Leia’s bed was a drawing. It was a drawing of their little family. It brought a smile to Vader under his mask, yet another thing to add to the ever-growing list of things that annoyed Vader about his suit. He could see his children with his own eyes, only through the view of his mask. He can never talk to his children sounding kind, he fears that his children are afraid of him. He can’t eat with his children at meal times. He can never express his emotions to his children without using his words. They will never see him smile at them. They will never see what it looks like when’s proud of them, or when he’s happy. They will only ever see his mask.

He hated the mask. He hated the suit. He wished he could take it off and see it burn in the fires of Mustafar. He wished he could look just like he used to and be able to eat and breathe as normal. He more than hated the mask, he _loathed_ it.

He thought about the mask the whole walk to his quarters. He was exhausted. He had to split his time between ruling an empire and being a good father. As soon as he was able to, he fell asleep.

Whilst he was in his sleep, he heard a voice that was so familiar to him. Anakin. Anakin. Anakin. The voice called out to him. Suddenly a figure appeared before him. As the women got closer and closer, he realised that it was Padme. Vader found himself standing by the lake on Naboo. Padme’s head was resting on his shoulder and in each of their arms they held the twins. Padme was holding Luke, and Vader was holding Leia. He looked down and he wasn’t in his suit. He was in his Jedi robes.

“Ani isn’t the sunset beautiful?” Padme said quietly. In front of him, the sun was setting. The sky was painted beautiful shades of pink, orange, and purple. He was no longer Vader, he was Anakin again.

Even though it was a dream, he could still feel the feeling of peace and happiness he felt within himself. He wasn’t weighed down with his heavy mechanical limbs. He could feel touch of Leia’s hand on his cheek. He had never felt that before, it made him so happy that it made him cry.

“Why are you crying?” She asked him.

“I’m just very happy.” Anakin replied as held his daughter tight. 

“But crying is for sadness.” Luke protested.

“Sometimes you can get so happy that all that you can do is cry. Your father loves you so much and that makes him so happy that all he can do it cry.” Padme explained to the children.

“I love you too.” Leia said to Anakin and wrapped her arms around his neck. Anakin had never been happier than in that moment.

“I’m so glad that you left the dark side behind.” Padme whispered. “I don’t know what would have happened if you continued down that path. Nothing good would have come from it. But here, we’re happy. We have two beautiful children, and I love you. It can’t get any better than this.”

“I love you too Padme.” Anakin wrapped his free arm around Padme’s shoulder and brought her in close. Leia soon fell asleep in the crook of his neck. He felt the rhythmic pattern of her breathing, and the feeling of her breath was warm down the back of his neck. Her big brown curls were flowing gently in the calm evening breeze. Anakin savoured the moment, but it didn’t last.

Vader pulled himself out of the dream and into the real world. He felt tears rolling down his cheeks. He was no longer Anakin standing by Padme’s side on Naboo. He was Vader on his star destroyer, the _Executor_. It was the life he wanted. He didn’t want to be the way he was. He missed Padme with all his might. He wanted to be Anakin again, but he couldn’t be. Padme was gone, and there was no way to bring her back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this chapter! I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy during this epidemic. Since Australia is being urged to stay indoors as much as possible, it won't take me nearly as long to get out another chapter, I hope!


	5. Explosions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the twin's 16th birthday, and Leia has a revelation.

_Leia_. A voice called out to Leia in the dark abyss. _Leia_. It was a soft voice belonging to a woman. _Happy Birthday baby_ , the voice called out again. _My beautiful daughter_. When Leia finally woke, her eyes struggled to make sense of her surroundings. She was in her room however it didn’t appear to her as normal. Leia sat up in her bed, and at the end of her bed there was a woman brushing the hair of a young girl that looked like a young version of herself. She watched as the women brushed the young girl’s hair gently.

“Mother.” Leia whispered and when Leia blinked, the pair disappeared. Sadness flooded Leia. The only time she got to see her mother was when she was dreaming.

“Happy 16th Birthday.” Luke said sleepily. She was so enthralled by her mother that she hadn’t even noticed her brother appear in her door way.

“You too.” Leia mumbled.

“Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Luke asked.

“I’m fine, still waking up.” Leia lied. They had gotten much closer as they got older. They realised that they needed each other in the world that they lived in. The cruel world of the empire where no one would be looking out for them except their father.

“Well do it quickly, father wants to meet us at the bridge.” Luke said as he walked off.

“No rest for the wicked.” Leia said to herself as she got out of bed. Vader liked it when the twins were up early and well prepared for the day. Being up early meant more to accomplish. She changed out of pajamas and into attire that appropriate to be seen in on the bridge.

She arrived there before Luke of course, he was always late. Vader was standing at the edge of the bridge, looking out at the convoy below them. He heard the footsteps of Leia behind him and turned to see her.

“Happy 16th Birthday, my daughter.” Vader’s voice boomed. He pulled Leia in for a hug, the only person he would ever hug. He towered over the now 16-year-old. Leia felt safe in his arms, although she could hear the grinding noise of her fathers aging prosthetics. When he released her, Leia sighed. Vader knew what that sigh meant.

“Father, I know I ask you this every year.” Leia began.

“Leia.” Vader groaned.

“But I just have to ask.” Leia continued. “Please, can you take off your mask.”

“Leia you know I can’t.” Vader was stern about his response, it was the same one every year.

“Please. I just want to know what you look like.” Leia begged. “This all I’ve ever known. I want to know if I have your eye’s, or your nose, or any of your facial features. Please.”

“Leia, I can’t. You know this. One day, I hope to look upon you with my own eyes, but right now that’s just not possible.” There was hint of sadness to Vader’s voice. Leia nodded her head, that was the best she was going to get from him at that moment in time. Leia stood beside her father and watched on of the convoy. There was an abundance of star destroyers and TIE fighters below, all serving in the name of the empire that she would one day inherit. Straight ahead of her was the Death Star. Completed, but mostly inactive. Luke came running, claiming that he had been distracted by a TIE fighter he could see from him window.

“Now that you’re here Luke.” Vader’s mask hissed. “In celebration of your 16th birthday, the galaxy will be made aware of the full power of the Death Star.”

Luke’s eyes widened.

“Are we going to be allowed on it?” Luke asked.

“Yes Luke, but that isn’t going to be the highlight of today. Today we’ll be destroying a planet. Alderaan, to be specific.” Vader announced.

“Alderaan?” Leia whispered.

“Yes, let’s deal with the Organa’s once and for all.” Vader boomed.

“Just because they adopted me?” Leia sighed.

“Because they took you away from me! I missed your first words and your first steps, all because they took you away from me! I’ve let them live long enough.” Vader growled, but regained his professional manner. “Admiral Bryaut, prepare the shuttle to make way to the Death Star.”

Leia felt conflicted. Part of her was proud to see the Empire in action. She had been raised in the Empire, and it was finally starting to harness the power her father had promised her. She remembered many nights when her father would tuck her into bed and he would tell her promises of a powerful empire. The other part of Leia didn’t want this to happen. Millions of innocent people would die, all in the name of this all-powerful empire. Leia wasn’t even sure it was something she wanted to fight for anymore. Leia didn’t agree with the ideals, but she didn’t have a choice. This was what she was raised for. Her family is here. There was no other place for her.

She didn’t feel like she was a Sith. She didn’t crave power. She didn’t feel herself overwhelmed by hate and fear. She knew her father was. She could sense the hate in her father, it stemmed towards the Organa’s, especially at the moment. Secretly, Leia was looking into other areas of the force. The Jedi, the grey Jedi, it fascinated her. They felt right to her.

The shuttle was ready quickly and the three of them were ushered on. They drifted towards the Death Star, which was stationed above Geonosis to keep it hidden from the galaxy. This was the first time either of the twins were stepping foot on the space station. Leia was hoping that it would calm her internal conflict, however it made the part of her that wasn’t a Sith stronger. There was a voice whispering to her. _Be the voice for those whose voice can’t speak right now_. Leia tried to block it out, but it was strong.

“Set course for the Alderaan system.” Her father ordered, and they were thrust into hyper space. “It’ll take all day to get there children, today I want the two of you to train with each other. I can’t be there, I have to supervise here. When we arrive, I’ll send for you.”

The twins nodded, and they were shown to the training room on the Death Star. Now that they were older, Vader trusted the two children to be responsible for their lightsabers. They wore them from their belts and were always with them.

As Vader watched them walk off, he became sad. His children were growing up. They were getting older. He wished they could stay little forever, but that was beyond his abilities. He wished Padme could be there to see them grow older.

Leia and Luke didn’t do much training that day. Instead the two of them talked. They hoped that because it was their 16th birthday that their father wouldn’t be mad. They talked until the end of the day.

“I sense conflict within you, Leia.” Luke said.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Leia responded, trying her best to mask her worry. Luke was loyal to the Empire, she didn’t know how he would act.

“Between the dark and light.” Luke clarified. As if Leia lost control of her emotions, she burst into tears.

“I don’t want to be one of the bad guy’s Luke.” She sobbed.

“But we’re not the bad guys.” Luke said quietly. “We’re the hero’s, not the villains.”

“People don’t run away from the hero’s out of fear.” Leia snapped. Luke didn’t say anything to that. Breaking the silence, a stormtrooper entered the room to escort them to Vader in the bridge.

“Don’t tell father.” Leia hissed.

“I won’t, you have my word.” Luke mumbled.

The walk was much longer than it was on the star destroyer. Neither of the twins said a word the whole trip. When they arrived at the bridge, Alderaan was staring back at them. It took all of Leia’s self-control to not cry in front of Vader. This isn’t what she wanted.

“The galaxy would now know the full power of the battle station.” Vader announced. “It’s time.”

“Father is this really necessary? Do we have to rule the Empire out of fear?” Leia asked.

“Yes, daughter.” Vader muttered. “We do.”

The bridge was filled with the hum of the reactor. Leia wanted to close her eyes, so she didn’t have to look, but she was frozen. The super laser zapped Alderaan, causing the planet to explode. The explosion was loud, but not as loud as the screaming in her head, which was suddenly silenced.

“See, it wasn’t that bad.” Vader sighed.

“You can just use a weapon of the Empire to fulfill your personal inquests?” Leia muttered.

“When you’re a ruler of the galaxy, you can do whatever you want.” Vader barked. Luke didn’t show any emotion, instead he shrugged and announced that he was ready to go to sleep. A stormtrooper took them to their room. Leia hadn’t said another word, she was still in shock. As she crawled into bed, she made a declaration to herself. She wasn’t a Sith, and she wasn’t apart of the Empire. She wasn’t evil, and she wasn’t one of the bad guys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter ended up being more Leia-centric than I had planned for, so I hope that's okay. It'll return to Vader next chapter, however!


	6. Masks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after their 16th is more explosive than the day before.

When the explosion sounded, Vader felt as if a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. The weapon he had been constructing for 16 years was finally complete and it worked. Not only was his super weapon completed, his daughter’s _captors_ were finally gone. No longer did he have to worry about them finding a way back into his life. They were gone, and for good too. He looked at his children’s faces. Both of them were silent. Vader could see pain in Leia’s eyes, but Luke was blank, eerily blank.

“See, it wasn’t that bad.” Vader sighed.

“You can just use a weapon of the Empire to fulfill your personal inquests?” Leia muttered.

“When you’re a ruler of the galaxy, you can do whatever you want.” Vader barked. Finally, Luke reacted. He shrugged carelessly.

“It’s been a long day. Goodnight father, I’m going to bed.” Luke yawned. The stormtrooper who had brought them there took them away to their new quarters, this was their home now.

As they walked away, Vader could sense a conflict within his daughter. It was a battle between the light and the dark. It reminded him much of the conflict within himself when he was younger. The conflict between Anakin and Vader. Vader was more powerful than Anakin. Anakin was weak. He hoped that Leia’s training would be enough to set her down the right path. She had the abilities to become powerful. He believed in his daughter, he trusted his daughter. After all, she was her father’s daughter.

Much like his children, Vader found himself tired. It had been a big day of preparation to make sure that the Death Star was ready. He retired to his chambers and closed his eyes.

_Anakin_. A women’s voice whispered. Padme was once again in front of him. _Anakin_. Padme said gently. Vader found himself sitting at a table beside Padme. A large spread of food was in front of him. He wasn’t Vader, he was Anakin again. There was a Shaak pot roast, blue milk, fruit, and sushi. All the foods that Vader couldn’t have as Vader. He took a bite of the roast and could feel it running down his throat. It tasted so much better than he remembered that it almost brought tears to his eyes. It wasn’t anything like the slop he was forced to eat through a tube, this had actual flavour.

“Can you believe that our babies turn 16 today?” Padme whispered. “It feels just like yesterday that I was holding the both of them in my arms by the lake on Naboo, you holding me. The four of us at peace. Nothing to worry about but us. Now Luke’s taller than me and Leia’s got more attitude than you. They’re growing up to fast. I wish I could just freeze time and keep them young forever.”

Leia and Luke walked out of their rooms. They looked happy. No blank expressions or pain to be seen, just happiness. They joined Anakin and Padme at the table.

“Look at the two of you.” Padme said. “I can’t believe how old you two are getting.”

Anakin was looking at the two of his children with his own eyes. He didn’t want to go back to the mask of Vader.

“For your birthday, we got you each a gift.” Padme said as she pulled out two rectangular wrapped gifts. Each of the twins wrapped the paper off eagerly. Both of the twins had received a painting of their favourite place. Leia’s was of the mountains of Alderaan, a place she fell in love with after a political venture with her mother. Luke’s was of a field on Naboo, Anakin and Luke’s favourite place to mediate. Both of the twins fell in love with their gifts. Leia wrapped her arms around Anakin’s torso. Anakin could smell the perfume on her, it was one of Padme’s. He wanted to savor the moment, but he couldn’t.

Vader opened his eyes and he was back in his pod. He hated getting those dreams. They reminded Vader of everything he couldn’t have. Sometimes it made him wonder. _Was the dark side really worth the sacrifice of the life he could have had?_

He was done sleeping for the day. He marched right back to the bridge. It seemed to be the only place he ever seemed to belong. He spent most of his days there, usually without his children. He walked out on the bridge. Out the large window, he saw the tiny residue of Alderaan floating around. A reminder of his power. As he stood there admiring his work, an officer approached him. 

“Lord Vader, we have just received word that a Rebel Alliance has been formed against the Empire.” The officer told him, fearing for his life.

“A rebel alliance? What do you know about it?” Vader asked the officer. _How long had they been in action? Who founded them?_ Vader’s head was swarming with questions. _What would they want from the Empire? How many were there? How much power did they have?_

“Nothing sir, except that they’re trying to take us down.” The officer said warily.

“Who is it led by? Where is their base? How big is their force? Do they have the senate’s support?”

“No sir, the senate doesn’t know anything about it. I don’t know anything about it.” The officer said.

“Find out everything you can about these, rebels. I’ll see to it personally that each and every one of them is taken care of.” Vader’s voice bellowed. He was full of anger.

Leia was standing behind the corner and heard everything. A rebel alliance to take down the Empire? That’s where she belonged. She wanted to take the Empire down and bring her father back to the light. She knew that it was in him. She knew that he wasn’t fully committed to the dark side. She could feel it. Neither was Luke. This could be her chance.

Right now, she had a burning desire to discuss something else with her father, the rebels would have to wait. She had had another dream about her mother that night. This time she didn’t appear as clear to her as she had in the past. She appeared as a blurry figure to Leia. She didn’t say anything to her. It was as if she were a stranger. She was fading from Leia, and Leia didn’t want it to be forever.

Leia walked up behind Vader, who was shocked to see her. It was very rare that he was joined on any bridge by his children, even on the star destroyer.

“What are you doing here Leia?” Vader asked her.

“I wanted to talk to you.” Leia said gently. “About my mother.”

Vader sighed. He rarely talked about Padme to either of the twins, regardless of how often they asked. It was painful to even think about, let alone say her name out loud.

“No.” Vader said simply. “Where has this sudden interest come from?”

“I had a dream about her last night, but I couldn’t quit see her clearly. There is so much I don’t know about her that I can’t even see her in my dreams.” Leia mumbled. “Please, I want to fill this void.”

“No Leia.” Vader grumbled, but Leia wasn’t about to give up.

“Why not? I’m old enough to know about her. She’s apart of who I am. I deserve to know!” Leia said forcefully. “Tell me! Just tell me! I’m old enough. I’m 16, I’m tired of hearing the word no, and if you don’t tell me then I’ll find a way. You know I will.” Vader knew this wasn’t a fight he was going to win. She was determined, his daughter. She was a fighter, not a quitter.

“Fine.” Vader snapped, Leia knew how to wind him up. “She was beautiful, your mother.”

“No, use her name. Use my mother’s name.” Leia interrupted.

“Leia, stop pushing.” Vader barked.

“No. _She_ has a name.” Leia protested. “Use my mother’s name. She deserves that at the very least. After years of being forgotten.”

“Leia, I told you to stop. I can’t.” Vader snapped, Padme was definitely not forgotten.

“You've told me how much I look like her, if it's that hard to say her name then how can you look at me?” Leia blurted out.

“Leia!” Vader was shocked by his daughter’s sudden outburst. “Don’t say things like that.”

He could sense that she had more to say. The tears in her eyes broke his heart. He knew he wouldn’t like what would next come out of her mouth.

“Out with-it Leia. There’s something on your mind.” Vader demanded.

“No.” Leia said shakily. “I’m not saying anymore.”

“Leia! Open your mouth and use your words.” Vader growled.

“It’s not about this so it’s fine.” Leia hissed.

“Don’t speak to me like that, I am your father!”

“I don’t see my father standing in front of me.” Leia whispered. Vader stood there, as stiff as a board.

“What?” Vader said as quietly as he could through his mask.

“I don’t see my father standing in front of me.” Leia said again. “I know that he is in there somewhere. He is some where in there, hidden under that mask, but he’s not who I see standing here now. That mask is hiding him from me. I don’t see my father standing in front of me.”

Vader has had all his limbs cut off of him and have burnt on the ash of Mustafar, but somehow this hurts more to him than that pain ever could. His head was throbbing, and he could feel tears rolling down his cheek’s inside the mask. He had never felt this pain before. Not when his mother died in his arms, nor when found out about the death of his wife. He wasn’t feeling anger, just pain and sadness.

“What do you see in front of you then?” He asked her.

“I don’t know.” She whispered.

“You can go now Leia.” Vader muttered. Leia did exactly what was told of her. She took off for her room. Vader stood there silently for a moment. As if he had no control over his emotions, he ripped off the mask that was so vital to his survival and threw the two pieces onto the floor with all his might wishing that they would shatter. They didn’t of course. He pulled out the lightsaber and activated it. He used all of his strength to slice the two pieces of his helmet into tiny pieces. He has never felt such a strong desire to destroy the helmet. He’s always hated it, but now he hated it more than ever. He stood there to admire his work. The helmet was thoroughly destroyed. He was breathing. He was breathing fine. Better than fine. He was breathing perfectly. His master had lied to him. He didn’t need to helmet. He was so angry that he was seeing red. He was angry and in pain. He was hurt by his daughter, and angry at his old master. He was so overwhelmed by emotion that he didn’t know how to react, instead he just stood there.

Leia was also feeling her emotions running high. She couldn’t believe that she had actually said that. Years of feeling that way had just been spilled to her father. She couldn’t stay there any longer. She had to get away from the empire, she had to get away from her father. There was only one other place she could think to go, and she didn’t even know how to get there or where to go.

She grabbed a communicator off of a wall. She didn’t know who to reach out to. She struggled for a moment. Possibly survivors of Alderaan, she thought. She reached out to any survivors.

“Hello? Is there anybody there?” Leia said into the communicator. At first nothing came through, then a few scrambled words, before finally hearing a voice.

“Hello?” The voice said. It was a voice that she knew. A voice from her early years.

“You’re okay?” Leia was relieved.

“Bail? Who is it?” She heard another voice say.

“Who is this?” Bail Organa said.

“It’s Leia.”

“Leia? Is that really you?” Bail was surprised to hear from Leia after all these years.

“Yes, it’s me, quickly, are you involved with the rebel alliance?” Leia asked.

“How do you know about that?” Bail said, shocked.

“Please, if you are I need to join you. I need to take down the Empire and bring back my father.” Leia begged.

“Bail don’t say another word.” She heard the other voice say, which she now recognized as Breha’s.

“We can trust her, I know we can. I can feel it.” Bail said, full of hope. “Leia can you get to Coruscant? I’ll send someone to collect you and bring you to the base.”

“Yes, I can get there.” Leia mumbled.

“Okay, we’ll see you soon. Come quickly, we have much to discuss.” Bail said and ended communication.

Leia took one last look at the Death Star. She hoped that it would be the last time she would ever have to see it. The hangar was nearby, and Leia managed to sneak in. There weren’t many ships to choose from. There was shuttle, which was much to big for her to fly alone. There were a few TIE fighters. She had only flown a couple of times in one, but she didn’t have much of an option. She jumped in one and flew away from the hangar. She wasn’t confident in her flying abilities, but right now she didn’t have a choice. The TIE fighter didn’t have light speed, so she’d have to get there in real time. She was hungry now and wished she had gotten something to eat but it was too late for that now.

There was something oddly peaceful about flying through space by herself, she liked it at first, however when she approached Coruscant she was lucky it was over. She was surprised that nobody from the Empire had followed her, she was grateful however. She landed on a platform on Coruscant and waited for someone to collect her. Bail didn’t tell her where to go or who he was sending.

She waited for a while before finally being approached by someone.

“Are you Leia?” A woman asked, and Leia nodded. “Hi, I’m Ashoka Tano, I’m here to collect you and take you to the base.”

When Vader found out that he didn’t need his helmet he was filled with conflicted feelings. He most prominent feeling was happiness. Now he could finally show himself to Leia, just as she had wanted. He ran all the way down to her room, seeing the Death Star for the very first time with his own eyes.

He stopped when he reached her room. His stomach dropped when he found out that she wasn’t inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! I've just been hit with idea's that I had to write before I forgot and ended up writing full chapters for. Please mind the ending, it's a little bit rushed but I'm exhausted and ready for bed! I'm not sure when the next chapter will be out, but it won't be too far away.


	7. Faces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vader, Luke, and Leia reflect on what the explosion meant to them.

_LUKE_

The explosion left a ringing in Luke’s ears. Suddenly the once peaceful planet of Alderaan was in a billion different pieces. Luke was in shock. The empire that he had been brought into had not prepared him for this. When he told his sister that they were the heroes not the villains, Luke believed it. The empire that he was serving were the heroes of the galaxy. However, as soon as the laser hit Alderaan, his illusion shattered. He no longer believed he was on the right side. He was no longer a hero like he told himself. He lied to himself. He had just witnessed the deaths of 2 billion innocent people. It wasn’t right. This wasn’t what he wanted to fight for. He was one of the villains all along. He wanted to yell at his father and tell him how wrong this was, but he couldn’t muster the words.

“It’s been a long day. Goodnight father, I’m going to bed.” Luke was shocked by the words that had just come out of his mouth. Was that all he could say? He’d just witnessed a mass murder and all he could say was that he was going to bed. He and Leia were escorted to their new rooms on the Death Star. Leia didn’t say a word. All she did was look down at the floor in front of her. There was no longer a conflict in her. Luke could sense that there was no Sith in her. She was pulling towards the light. Their rooms were side by side. Leia went into hers and her door slammed shut. Luke stood outside of his for a while.

He didn’t deserve a room, he told himself. He didn’t deserve a comfortable bed with a blanket to keep him warm. He didn’t deserve the big window that gave him a view of the stars shining bright. He didn’t deserve the security that he knew he would always be safe from the wrath of the empire because he was the son of Vader. He didn’t deserve the clothes on his back. He didn’t deserve to be treated with respect. _He was a monster._

He didn’t go into his room for the night. Instead he walked. He made his way through corridors until he found himself standing at the front of the detention block. As the Death Star was still being moved into, the detention block was inactive. That’s where he deserved to be. There was nobody supervising it, so Luke didn’t even have to sneak in. He told himself he deserved to be there. He went into the first cell and sat on the bench. It was a hard slab, nothing like his bed. That it what he deserved to be. He deserved to wake up in the morning with a pain in his back. The slab was hard, which made it difficult to drift off.

Luke found himself on a planet that he didn’t recognize. He was sitting in a field with long grass. There were waterfalls in the distance. Sitting in front of him was a woman.

“Luke.” Her voice was soft and calming. She looked an awful lot like Leia. “Luke. This isn’t you fault. Please don’t beat yourself up about it. This is your father’s doing. He’s not a bad man Luke, he’s just afraid. You can bring him back Luke, you and your sister.”

The woman reached out to touch Luke’s face, when he heard somebody else call his name. The voice was gravely and felt like it was coming from another world. He opened his eyes and he was back in the detention block. In the doorway of the cell was his father, except his father didn’t have his mask on. His suit was all the same, but he was missing his mask. His father’s head a large scar on the top of skull, and one on his cheek. He was extremely pale, as white as a ghost.

“Luke where’s your sister?” Vader asked his son in a panic. His voice wasn’t as terrifying outside of the mask.

“Father? What’s the matter? Where’s your mask?” Luke said groggily.

“Where is your sister Luke? We can’t find her anywhere!” Vader snapped.

“I don’t know, the last thing I saw she was in her room.” Luke mumbled.

“She’s not there. She’s not anywhere!” Vader exclaimed, and turned to the troopers and officers that were behind him. “Find my daughter!”

Vader took off out of the detention block. Luke ran after him, desperate for answers.

“What’s going on?” Luke asked again.

“Your sister is missing, so is one of the TIE fighters. She’s run away.” Vader barked. For the first time in Luke’s life, he could see into his father’s eyes. They were full of fear.

_VADER_

Leia wasn’t in her room. Vader’s heart sunk. He saw his reflection on the shiny reflective floor. It showed a man that he did not recognize. There was no hair on his head. A large scar replaced the golden-brown locks he used to have. He was pale after years of not seeing the sun. The man in front of him scared himself more than the man in the mask. He seemed less human that way.

_Where was his daughter? Where else could she be?_

Vader searched the space station from top to bottom, sending crews after crews to search for her, however there was no trace.

_What could have happened to her? Where could she have gone?_

Vader suddenly felt dizzy. He wasn’t sure if it was the increase of oxygen in his lungs or if it was anxiety about his daughter. Nobody knew anything. His head was spinning. He was a terrible father. How could he lose his daughter? _Only a terrible father loses his daughter_ , he told himself. Luke, maybe Luke knew where she was. When he checked Luke’s room, he wasn’t there either. His bed was freshly made, which was unlike him. The corners were so neatly tucked in that it was impossible for it to be Luke’s doing. The best was still made from the storm troopers setting up of the room.

Vader felt like he was in a bad dream. Everything was happening so slowly, yet so fast at the same time. He could feel himself swaying from side to side and tried to stop himself from falling over. What was happening. He had lost both of the twins.

“Lord Vader.” An officer approached Vader. “A TIE fighter has been reported missing from the hangar.”

“Check the security holograms.” Vader demanded.

“None were recording at the time, we checked.” The officer responded.

“Both of my children were missing. Were both on the TIE fighter?” Vader asked.

“Luke was last reported at the detention block Lord Vader, an hour ago.” The officer replied, confused as to why Vader was reporting Luke missing. Vader took off in the direction of the detention block. He hadn’t been done that way of the station yet. What on earth was Luke doing there? He asked himself. As he stormed the corridors, he saw his reflection on the wall panels. It still shocked him that that was the face under the mask. He hadn’t properly seen his reflection in 16 years, it came as an alarming shock to him.

Luke was fast asleep in the first cell. Vader was concerned to see his son sitting there. Did this have anything to do with why he was so blank about Alderaan? Vader wanted to ask but he didn’t have the time, Leia could be on the other side of the galaxy by now.

“Luke!” Vader yelled to try and wake up his son. “Luke!”

Luke opened his eyes slowly. He was alarmed to see Vader without his mask.

“Luke where’s your sister?” Vader asked his son in a panic.

“Father?” Luke said in disbelief as his father was standing right in front of him. “What’s the matter? Where’s your mask?”

“Where is your sister Luke? We can’t find her anywhere!” Vader snapped.

“I don’t know, the last thing I saw she was in her room.” Luke mumbled.

“She’s not there. She’s not anywhere!” Vader exclaimed, and turned to the troopers and officers that were behind him. “Find my daughter!”

Vader took off out of the detention block. Luke ran after him, desperate for answers.

“What’s going on?” Luke asked again.

“Your sister is missing, so is one of the TIE fighters. She’s run away.” Vader barked.

“Run away? That can’t be possible! She barely knows how to use a TIE fighter?” Luke muttered.

“She’s nowhere here on this station, and a TIE fighter someone ends up missing? Your sister has run away! Do you know where she could be?” Vader was straining his voice to try and sound as menacing without his mask on.

“No, I didn’t even know she wanted out.” Luke lied. He knew that Leia wasn’t happy in the Empire, but not so unhappy that she could just leave.

Vader’s heart was beating so hard he could hear it beating inside of him. She was gone. His little girl was gone.

_LEIA_

Leia sat silently in the transport. It had been a while since she had seen Coruscant. She missed the planet wide city and its lights. Leia had an obsession for light. Ashoka sat beside her in disbelief. Her old master’s child was sitting right in front of her. She was amazed at how much Leia looked like her mother. She could see Padme shining right through Leia. _They have the same eyes_ , Ashoka thought to herself.

“You knew my mother? Didn’t you? And my father?” Leia said at last in a small voice.

“How do you know that?” Ashoka asked her.

“I know your name. My father used to tell Luke and I stories of your adventures when we were much younger.” Leia said quietly. Ashoka was filled with two different emotions. Happiness, that the man that she considered a brother to her still remembers her. But also, sadness, at the man that he had become. The monster that he had become.

“Can you tell me about her? My mother?” Leia begged.

“Do you not know anything about her?” Ashoka asked her in surprise, and Leia nodded. She was surprised that the girl in front of her was 16 years old and had no knowledge of her mother.

“Well, Padme was one of the most compassionate people I have ever met. She stopped at nothing to help people. She almost died to help the Republic on many occasions. She even helped me clear my name to the Jedi council. You’re lucky to have her as a mother, even if she isn’t with you physically. Your mother and father had to hide their marriage from the Republic. It’s forbidden for a Jedi to form attachments. That’s what started your father’s journey to the dark side. I could sense that there was something going on between the two of them.” Ashoka sighed.

“It was my mother’s fault that my father turned to the dark side?” Leia said softly.

“I wouldn’t say that.” Ashoka began. “Your father was full of fear. He was scared that Padme would die in childbirth, and the fear took over him. But your father is a good man. I loved him like my brother.”

“You survived the Jedi massacre.” Leia whispered. Ashoka was quiet for a moment.

“No. I’m not a Jedi, not anymore.” Ashoka’s voice trailed off as she thought back to her days as a Jedi. They seemed like a past life to Ashoka, as if it happened to someone else. She still remembers when first heard about Order 66 and feared for the lives of the friends that she had made at the temple. The tiny bits of Jedi left in her died with her old masters that day. She promised herself she would avenge their deaths. Revenge is not a trait of the Jedi, and she was no longer a Jedi.

“When was this alliance formed?” Leia asked in a voice barely above a whisper to keep away from prying ears.

“Only recently. That’s why we were all so shocked to hear from you. Now that the Empire knows about our existence we have to be extra careful. Most of us didn’t want you to join us. They were worried that it was trap. It was Bail Organa who told us to have faith in you. He knew you would do good one day.”

Hearing the name Bail brought unrest to Leia. She was her father for the first three years of her life, regardless of how he had obtained her. It was kidnapping, that’s what her father told her. She had been raised to hate him, but if there was anyone who could bring her father back, it was him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has a bit of a different lay out, but I don't think it'll be sticking around. Thank you for reading, and until the next chapter, goodbye old friend, and may the force be with you!


	8. Monsters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke feels conflicted, and Leia gets a reminder from her past.

Vader was angry at his daughter for leaving, he was furious. How dare she just leave? How dare she ditch him, Luke, and the Empire. He didn’t fight hard for her all those years ago for her to just leave him. He cared about his children more than he cared about anything. He was in a panic to find her. The galaxy was a scary place. Vader decided that she was still too young to be able to navigate it by herself. He never thought that she would throw herself into it without him.

Vader didn’t know what to do without her. His life had revolved around her and Luke for the past 13 years. He didn’t want to take it back, he didn’t want to go back. Vader didn’t want to go back to the man he was. He used to be as cold as ice, he didn’t care about anyone. He missed her. He wanted her in his arms, so he could apologise for everything that was wrong. He wanted to make it right for her. His feelings of rage were traded for waves of panic. He paced around the Death Star desperate to find her. He wished this was all a nightmare and that he’d wake up and she’d be in her bed sleeping soundly.

He wished that she was still young. He missed when she used to look up at him with awe. She used to look at him like he was her hero. She didn’t see anything wrong with what she was fighting for. She trusted her father that everything would be okay. She told him everything.

She no longer was the awe filled child she used to be. One day the awe fell away, and she no longer saw Vader as a hero. She grew up. Vader hated that his children had to grow up. The more they grew up the more they left him. The further they got from him.

Wherever she went, she took nothing with her. She went alone. He lightsaber was hanging from her belt, which was flung over a hook in the wall. Her bed was unmade. It felt like she was still on the ship. It didn’t feel right to say that she was gone, but they searched and searched with no results.

Luke followed Vader around the ship like a little lost puppy. He didn’t know what to do or how to help. _Some brother he is_ , he thought to himself. His sister was gone, and he didn’t know how to help.

“Father?” Luke was running to keep up with his father’s large strides. “Father? Why would she leave?”

 _I don’t see my father standing in front of me._ Her words were being repeated as screams inside Vader’s head and he didn’t know how to make it stop.

“She was upset.” Vader said at last.

“She was upset, and you just let her go off on her own?” Luke grumbled.

“I didn’t want her to see me angry, so I told her to leave. I didn’t think she’d leave the Death Star.” Vader snapped.

“When your child is upset, you don’t send them away! You hold them and promise them at everyone will be okay. You let them cry! You do everything you can to keep them safe!” Luke raged. Vader wasn’t used to being yelled at by Luke. There were times when Leia would yell, and it didn’t come as a surprise to Vader. Luke however, was more passive. He hadn’t even heard Luke raise his voice before. He took a step towards Luke, who jumped back.

“No. I’m not interested in anything from you right now.” Luke spat. He was angry, more than angry. He was infuriated with Leia. _It was all her fault_ , he thought. _It’s all her fault that we’re falling apart._

“Luke-” Vader began, but Luke cut him off.

“Leave me be, before I say something that you and I both know I won’t mean but will cause all of this to be much worse.” Luke interrupted. He marched off. He didn’t know where he wanted to go, he just wanted to get away from his father. He was full of anger, he knew the best place to take care of that. He marched right towards the training room and pulled out his lightsaber. He didn’t bother turning on a light. The dim room was filled with red. Red was casted onto the walls, and on the floor. He set the remote on its highest setting, a setting that even Vader himself struggled with. Luke was so full emotion that he was seeing red. Anger was pulsing through his veins. His struggle to not cry was being felt in his throbbing head. He hit everyone of those blasts coming through the remote. He didn’t feel like he had control over himself. He felt fully consumed by the dark side. Maybe this really was his path. Maybe this was truly meant for him. Maybe this was where he was meant to be. In that moment, it felt right. Everything the seemed so wrong to him in the past, suddenly seemed to feel so right. Alderaan didn’t feel so wrong anymore. They denied the Empire, they must own up to their mistakes. It was as if a switch went off in his head. Is this what he really wanted? Did he really want to be this way? He didn’t know. He was confused. He didn’t know what was right or what was wrong.

He fell onto his knees. He couldn’t keep in his tears any longer. He sobbed loudly into his hands. The room was soundproofed, so the sound of his crying echoed and bounced off the walls. He begged for a sign to set him down the right path. He didn’t know what to do.

“Please!” He screamed until his throat was raw. “What do I do?”

His head fell into his hands again and he continued to sob. He felt someone’s hand softly graze his cheek. He looked up and saw a woman sitting in front of him. It was the same women from the field. She looked even more like Leia in the dark. She looked at lot older than Leia.

“It’s okay Luke.” The woman whispered. She took Luke’s hand and squeezed it gently. “It’s okay to be confused. One day, you’ll know in your heart what is truly right. Until then, you just have to trust yourself. Do what feels right for you. This confusion won’t last for long.”

The woman disappeared, and it was as if she wasn’t there in the first place.

Once again, the Skywalker family was separated. Not all physically, but by their emotions. Leia was on the other side of the galaxy, yet she could still feel some of the emotional turmoil that she had left in her father and brother.

The sun had sent on Dantooine and the stars had come out. The transport had just arrived on the green planet. When Leia looked up at the night sky, she felt a small sense of relief wash over her. She knew that her father and brother were looking at the same galaxy, even though they were on the other side of it. She hadn’t been out like this by herself before, and it felt strange. It’s something she wished she could experience with Luke, but this was something that she couldn’t do with him.

Bail was the first out to meet her. He looked so much older than she remembered him to be. He ran towards her and pulled her in for a hug. She hadn’t seen him in 13 years. He was such a small part of her memory.

“I missed you Leia.” He whispered to her. “I knew that one day you’d come back to me.”

“There’s one thing I want to make very clear.” Leia said quietly. “I’m not here to turn my back against my father. I’m here so that I can bring him back to the light and put an end to the Empire.”

“Leia, there’s no light left in him.” He sighed sadly.

“You’re wrong. There is still good in him. I feel it every day. Every time that he’s near I feel it. I’m his daughter. I know that in him is good.”

“He blew up a planet, killing billions. That man is a monster and will be treated as such.” Bail muttered.

“If you want me fighting along side you to bring the Empire down once and for all, you will not harm him in any way. He’s not a monster. He’s a man who didn’t know he had a daughter, and a son, for the first 3 years of their lives. He missed my first steps, breaths, screams, words. He’s hurt. He’ll never be able to experience them. Please, you have to help me.” Leia begged. Bail didn’t say anything at first. In front of him was a girl that he loved as his daughter. She was his daughter. He still thinks of her as such. He wanted to be the one to see an end to Vader, but for the sake of the girl he thought of as his daughter, he knew he couldn’t do that.

“We’ll bring down the Empire and restore the light in your father.” He mumbled. He saw the relief spread across Leia’s face.

“Thank you.” She breathed a sigh of relief. The group walked inside the base. Inside, were computers, workers and droids. Leia hadn’t seen that many droids in one place before in her life. The empire didn’t like droids. Bail called over two specific droids with a motion of his hand. A golden interpreter droid and a silver and blue astromtech droid.

“I am C-3PO, human cyborg relations, and this is my counterpart R2-D2.” The droid introduced himself. The second Leia heard their names, it seemed to unlock a memory that she forgot she had.

“Threepio! Artoo!” She exclaimed, wondering if they remembered her, or if they had had their memories wiped.

“Princess Leia! My goodness how you’ve grown. I wasn’t sure if I would ever see you again.” He said. Artoo beeped.

“Actually Threepio, Leia is no longer princess.” Bail said sadly.

“My mistake Miss Leia.” He said in response. The title Miss rang in Leia’s ears for a moment. It didn’t sit right to her.

“Come along Leia, there’s much to introduce.” Bail motioned for Leia to follow him.


	9. Welcomes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia hasn't received the warmest of welcomes from the rest of the rebels.

The stars were shining brightly over Dantooine. Leia was sitting with her legs crossed against the outside of the base. There was a slight breeze drifting through the air. The breeze felt peculiar on Leia’s skin. Most of her time was spent on the _Executor_ , in space where there’s no wind. She couldn’t decide whether she liked it or not. It was unfamiliar and made her feel a little uneasy.

The base was quiet. Most had retired to the barracks for the night, but Leia wasn’t ready to sleep. She sat outside and listened to the many thoughts that were circulating around her head. She was sitting by herself. She liked being alone. On the _Executor_ she was always being followed by a storm trooper by order of her father. There was always one outside of her quarters when she was sleeping, or one following her around the corridors. She couldn’t always see them, but they could always see her.

It had been a long night of dirty stares from the rest of congregation. Nobody trusts someone of the Empire. She had kept away from everyone. She hadn’t said anything else to Bail that night. She was overcome with guilt of everything the Empire had done.

She heard the shuffling of footsteps nearby but didn’t think anything of it. She was startled when she saw Threepio standing in front of her.

“Miss Leia, I would like to apologise for my rudeness earlier this evening.” Threepio announced.

“Threepio, it’s okay.” Leia said quietly. “You had no idea. It’s good to see you again.”

“You too Miss Leia. It has been so long that I thought you would have forgotten about me.” He said.

“That’s just not possible Threepio.” Leia said softly.

“I remember when you were very young. You used to follow Maser Organa around the Palace in dresses that were two big for you, yet you insisted on wearing them. You used to make me sit down and play with you. I vividly remember you playing senate on your last day on Alderaan. I never got to say goodbye to you, but I knew that I would see you again. I was right, because now you’re sitting in front of me, a very intelligent young lady you have become”

Leia couldn’t keep back her feelings anymore. She erupted in sobs.

“Is it something I said?” Threepio asked, alarmed at Leia’s sudden emotions. “I’m nothing more than a droid, and don’t understand human behavior.”

“No, Threepio.” Leia whispered. “I’m fine. I think it’s probably time for me to go to sleep.”

“Master Organa told me to inform you that you will not be required to sleep in the bunks. You have your own quarters.” Threepio informed Leia. “I can take you two them if you would like.”

Threepio led Leia through the base. She wasn’t sure why she had her own quarters. She didn’t want any special treatment. The room was very bare. There was a bed and a chest, nothing else. They weren’t there to be at home, Leia thought to herself. She thanked the golden droid, who left her alone. She got into the bed and tried to drift off. It was difficult. There was no goodbye from her father, which she had grown accustom to. It was silent. She felt uneasy. There were many things that she found that made her uneasy ever since she left the Death Star. Without her father, she felt unsafe. She realised how important her father really was to her. What was she doing on the other side of the galaxy without him? She regretted leaving. She wished that she had just stayed put, however she remembered what she was doing. She was doing the right thing. She was there to bring her father back to the light.

She eventually managed to drift off to sleep. When she opened her eyes, her room was filled with light. Her feelings of uneasiness and fear melted away in the sunlight. The base was no longer silent and was filled with the sound of chatter and hope. She was ready for breakfast and made her way to the eating quarters. The base looked a lot different in the early morning sunshine than it did in the evening light. As she passed her fellow rebels, they gave her dirty looks. Bail spotted her in the crowd and motioned for her to join him, Breha, and Ashoka at a table. As she looked around, she realised that she was the youngest of the rebels. She was cautious as she sat down. Breha wasn’t giving her the warmest of welcomes. Ashoka was welcoming her, yet she was wary of Leia. Bail was the happiest by far to see her.

“How did you sleep Leia?” Bail asked her.

“Very well, thank you.” Leia lied. “I have a question, however. Why am I getting special treatment? I’m here to fight.”

“It’s no secret, that many of the rebels here don’t appreciate your help in this matter, especially after Alderaan. For your safety, it was just better to have your own space.” He said, observing the many stares their table was getting. “Many don’t trust that you’re telling the truth for why you are here. Many suspect that your appearance here is a trap, and that you are a spy for the Empire.”

“I promise that I am telling the truth. I want to bring down the Empire just as much as the rest. I want to bring my father and brother to the light. I’m willing to do whatever it takes.” Leia whispered. Leia was still in shock that Bail and Breha survived Alderaan. She saw the planet become a billion different pieces within seconds with her own eyes. She felt force of the blow. She felt the billions of voices cry out in terror. It wasn’t possible they had survived.

“How did you survive?” Leia asked.

“Breha and I were off planet on diplomatic duties, we were on our way home when we heard about the destruction. I was horrified that something like that could happen under the control of the Empire. I was hesitant about this rebellion before then, but now I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life. This rebellion is a voice for those who can’t use theirs.” There was a distant look in his eye. It was one that Leia had worn only a couple of the days earlier. Breha was looking at Leia as if she was dirt on the bottom of her shoe. Bail noticed it as well.

“Leia, Ashoka. We will be meeting at 0900 as a whole. Until then you are free to do as you wish. Breha, a word?” Bail announced. Bail and Breha left the table and stood where they were out of earshot of everyone.

“Why are you against Leia?” Bail asked Breha. “She was our daughter. When Vader took her from us we made a promise that we would bring her home. She wants to bring her father to the light. I want what’s best for her and I will support her in her decision, even if it means letting her go. Why are you treating her in such a way? We raised her for three years. Have faith that she is doing the right thing.”

“She’s come directly from the Empire. Why would she be on our side? You’re not thinking clearly. You’re being clouded by Leia. Think! Please just think about this. We’re risking everything by having her here. There won’t be anything to fight for if we end up dead.” Breha muttered.

“She’s here for the right reasons. I hope you see that.” Bail mumbled and left Breha standing by herself.

At the table, Leia and Ashoka were finishing their breakfast.

“I know yesterday I asked you to tell me about my mother, but can you tell me about my father. About Anakin?” Leia asked.

“Your father was a good man.” Ashoka began. “He stopped at nothing to protect those he cared about. Your mother, myself. He was an amazing fighter. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone so skilled with a lightsaber. He managed to get us out of very dangerous situations with his lightsaber. He was a very skilled pilot too. He was reckless, but still very skilled. He was scared about a lot of things however. He would never admit to himself the things he was scared about, but I know he was.”

Suddenly, someone entered the eating quarters, screaming as loud as their lungs would allow them too for Bail Organa.

“Calm yourself and tell me what the matter is.” Bail tried to calm the screaming man.

“It’s Obi-Wan Kenobi sir, he’s just landed on the platform”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone is staying safe during this troubling time! 
> 
> Follow my tumblr for updates on this story and others:  
> https://madsinwonderland.tumblr.com/


	10. Truths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan returns to the base.

The name, _Obi-Wan Kenobi_ , did not sound familiar to Leia. She had never heard it before. The base had erupted in excitement with everyone rushing out to see the Jedi.

“Ashoka, who’s this Obi-Wan?” Leia asked. Ashoka was stunned that Leia had never heard of Obi-Wan before.

“He was your father’s master, when he was a Jedi. He’s a hero of the Old Republic.” Ashoka said. “Did you father never tell you about him?”

“No. In the first few days of us being with him, Father only told us stories about you. That stopped after the first few days, however. He never told us about the Old Republic after that.” Leia whispered. Ashoka nodded and the two of them joined the crowd that was running toward the platform. Leia couldn’t see the man that was causing the excitement over the heads of the rest of the rebels, no matter how high she jumped. Ashoka took the liberty of pulling Leia through the crowd. She pushed her way through the rebels, many of which gave Leia plentiful stares and dirty looks. When they were at the front of the crowd, Leia saw what the man looked like. He was old, much older than she expected him to look like. His hair was as white as snow. He looked wise. Leia had never seen this man physically before, yet he looked familiar to her.

“Master Kenobi! Forgive my abruptness, but how is it possible that you’re alive? Vader announced to the whole galaxy 13 years ago that he killed Obi-Wan Kenobi on Tatooine. How are you standing in front of us now?” Bail asked in shock.

“I sent out my spirit to confront Vader as he took Luke from his aunt and uncle. Vader had impaled my spirit, but not killed me. I returned to my physical body and hid out for all this time to make Vader think that I was indeed, dead. I heard that there was a rebellion formed, led by Bail Organa on Dantooine. I made my way to Mos Eisley and promised a pilot and his first mate payment upon arrival at the base. They’re on the ship now awaiting payment.” Obi-Wan explained.

“Which we will take care of, but for now, Obi-Wan I think it’s important for you to meet Leia.” Bail led Obi-Wan over to Leia. The old man’s face saddened when he saw Leia.

“Look at you.” He gasped. “How you’ve grown. I remember holding you when you were born. I remember placing you into the care of the Organa’s. You were there the day Vader took Luke.”

It suddenly clicked in Leia’s mind where she had seen Obi-Wan before.

“You’re the bad man.” Leia whispered.

“Pardon?” Obi-Wan was taken aback.

“Throughout my childhood, I had these nightmares about a _bad man_ taking me away. It was you all along. You were the one who took me from my father.” Leia could feel her heart beating hard inside her chest.

“Leia! Why don’t you greet the pilot and bring him down here, so we can give him his payment?” Bail swooped in. Leia stared at the old man in front of her, then she nodded and made her way to the ship. The ship looked old, very old. She was surprised it was still flyable. The ramp was down. She didn’t know the etiquette for entering a ship. Was she supposed to knock? Was she supposed to wait and be invited in? Against her better judgement she decided to enter the ship. She ran up the ramp and followed the sound of a man’s voice.

“You said it Chewie.” He heard the man say, followed by the roar of a Wookie. She knew the sound of a Wookie all to well, after all, they were slaves of the Empire. Their voices led her to the cockpit.

“Hello there.” Leia said. The man jumped, and the Wookie chuckled.

“Very funny Chewie.” The man scowled and turned to Leia. “What are you doing on my ship?”

“You’ve been asked to come down to the base to receive your payment.” Leia said. The man looked her up and down.

“What’s a pretty face like you doing in the rebellion?” He asked her with a cocky smirk on his face.

“I’m 16.” She sighed.

“My bad.” His face fell. “I’m Han Solo, Captain of the Millennium Falcon. Who might you be?”

“I’m Leia Skywalker.” She muttered. Fear shined in his eyes.

“You’re apart of the Empire!” Han exclaimed. “This is an Empire operation? The old man didn’t tell us that.”

“No, this isn’t an Imperial operation. This is a rebellion against the Empire.” Leia mumbled.

“You’re the daughter of Vader. Why are you in a rebellion?” Han asked.

“Nobody wants to bring down the Empire more than I do.” Leia snapped.

“Right.” Han, not trusting the words that were coming out of Leia’s mouth. “Let’s go Chewie.”

They moved right past her and left the ship. Leia wasn’t far behind. Most of the group had disbanded the platform and returned to the inside of the base. Obi-Wan hadn’t.

“Leia!” He called out to her. “How did you remember me?”

“I didn’t.” She mumbled. “You used to appear in my nightmares. I didn’t know who you were. I was afraid that you would take me away from my father. Turns out you already did that. Thanks to you, my father is a broken man. He’s so full of anger and hate because he didn’t get to raise us from birth. You took that away from him. I know you’re supposed to be a hero, but you’re no better than I am. Everyone here looks at me like the villain I am. They should be looking at you the same way.”

“I did it to protect you!” Obi-Wan hissed. “If Palpatine knew of your survival, you and your brother would have been killed. Bail and I knew that you had to be split up for your own protection.”

“Bail was part of it?” Leia asked in a small voice. “He purposely took me away from my father. That’s kidnapping! All of you. You’re all kidnappers!” She stumbled as she tried to get away from the old man.

On the other side of the galaxy, Luke was desperately trying to find Leia. He sat on the floor of Leia’s room, desperate to try and reach out to her.

“Leia.” He whispered into the force, desperate for a response. He repeated her name, yet nothing came in response. He hoped that he would get something. Whether it was a response, a feeling, a vision. There was nothing. He couldn’t tell if she was receiving his words, and chose to ignore them, or if his words weren’t reaching her at all.

“Leia, please.” He begged. “If you can hear me give me a sign. I just want to make sure that you’re okay, that you’re alive.” He was scared for his sister. His wished for nothing more than for her to be safe. He decided that if he closed his eyes, he might be able to reach her. He squeezed his eyes shut and called out to her again. This time, he felt their bond in the force stronger. He cleared his mind of everything.

“Leia. Hear me.” He whispered. Yet again, there was no response

On the other side of the Death Star, Darth Vader finally decided that it was time for his to find out why he suddenly didn’t need his helmet to breathe. He consulted a 2-1B medical droid to examine him.

“You in fact, do not need the helmet to aid with your breathing.” The droid informed Vader. “You can breathe on your own. You never needed the helmet.”

“I never needed it?” Vader repeated. “Then how come I had it in the first place?”

“Your suit was made to be able to control you. The helmet gave Emperor Palpatine complete control of you.” The droid said.

“But I killed him.” Vader snarled. “He’s been dead for 13 years. Why would he want to control me?”

“He thought of you as his slave.” The droid said in response. “He wanted you to do his bidding. He needed control of you.”

Rage was pulsating through Vader’s veins he gripped the area and squeezed his fist tight. The droid in front of him shattered into a thousand pieces, and just like that, his world turned upside down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for the rushed ending! I really just wanted to get it out. So please enjoy.


	11. Reflection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vader sees himself for the first time without his mask, making him question everything.

Vader felt as if everything he knew was a lie. He never needed the helmet? The many times that Vader asked Palpatine to forgo the helmet flew around inside his mind. He was a slave? He worked so hard as a child to break free from slavery that he didn’t realize that he was right back. Maybe he knew he was a slave and refused to admit to himself. Maybe after the death of Padme, he didn’t care what he was. Maybe he just accepted it and buried it deep down. Maybe he hated what he had become and thought that he deserved it. He hated himself. He had never hated himself more than he did in that moment. He was foolish, so foolish. He fell right into that trap.

In the medic room, there was a mirror hanging on the wall. For the first time, he could properly see himself. He was pale and ghastly. Sun hadn’t touched his skin in years. His scars from Mustafar looked as if they were still fresh. They didn’t look as if they had healed. He looked so different to the last time he saw himself. The last time he saw himself as a human, it was before he was Vader. It was when he still had Padme. There was no hair on his head. _It will never grow back_ , he though to himself. He wished that he could go back. Back to Padme, back to the Old Republic. He closed his eyes and imagined himself in the back to Padme’s apartment, which was their home. Leia and Luke practicing their techniques. Luke, a green lightsaber, he’s strong in the force. Leia, a blue lightsaber, a powerful warrior. He was watching the twins in a practice duel. He was watching over them, full of pride. He had an arm around Padme, who was also watching over them, full of pride as well. Obi-Wan was there too. Encouraging the twins. Order 66 hadn’t happened. Anakin was a Jedi master. Everything was as Anakin wished for. He was happy. Padme was happy. Luke was happy. Leia was happy.

He opened his eyes and he wasn’t in happy. He was staring back at himself. The monster that he was. He didn’t know what he wanted anymore. He no longer felt like a Sith Lord. He didn’t feel like Vader. Everything promised to him by Palpatine was a lie. He was promised that he could bring back Padme. He was promised that he would no longer feel pain or sadness. Vader felt nothing but pain and regret. The dark side was a lie. He wanted to be good again. He no longer wanted to be Vader. He wished that he could be Anakin. Anakin was a war hero. Anakin was loved by many. Anakin was happy, Vader wasn’t.

He could feel the force flowing through his veins. It didn’t feel like the dark side, but it also didn’t feel like the light. He wanted to put an end to the Empire. He hated its existence. He _loathed_ its existence. He wanted nothing more than to see the empire blown to smithereens, but he didn’t know how to do it.

He wondered what his children wanted. _How did Leia feel?_ He wondered. _Did she feel the same way? Did she want to destroy the Empire? Or Luke, did he want the same?_ Vader trained the twins in the dark side since they were 3. He never taught them anything else. He had to ask Luke. He had to know how he felt.

Vader left the Medic, his cape flowing as he marched down the corridors. The cape felt menacing. For the first time in his life, he ripped off the chain that kept the cape around his neck. It snapped under the force of Vader’s mechanical hand. He let it fall to his feet and continued to walk, leaving it behind.

He found Luke on his knees, sobbing into his hands. His activated lightsaber was on the floor of Leia’s room, discarded to the side filling the room with an aggressive red glow. The room was destroyed. Luke had slashed her bed and the wall, he could feel the Luke had done it out of anger. He felt a familiar presence nearby. It was safe and comforting. It was a good presence.

“Luke?” Vader whispered. His son shook his head. “Luke.” Luke didn’t look up, instead he continued to sob. Vader went over to him and pulled him into his arms. He felt the conflict in Luke. It was tearing him apart. Luke allowed himself to be comforted by his father. Vader’s arms were wrapped around his son. As Luke got older, he wouldn’t allow Vader to hold him, he told Vader that he wasn’t a child, but this was the exception. Vader held him tight, and Luke felt comforted in his arms. He felt like a child again. When he was a child life was so much simpler. He knew exactly how he felt when he was a child. There was no conflict, he didn’t have to worry about not being who he wanted to be. He wished that he could go back to his childhood. Vader and Luke sat there for a few moments. Nothing but the sound of crying from Luke.

“Father.” Luke said at last, finally finding his voice. “I don’t think I am who you want me to be. I’m not a Sith. I don’t want to rule this way.”

Vader felt Luke’s conflict melt away. No longer did he feel the conflict. He was good. He was in the light.

“You want to abandon to Empire, don’t you?” Vader asked.

“I want to take them down. Leia is right, I don’t want to be one of the bad guys. I want to be good.” Luke mumbled.

“I want to be good too.” Vader mumbled. “I want to take down the Empire. I don’t want this life anymore. I don’t want to be Vader.”

“What do we do?” Luke whispered.

“Get some sleep son.” Vader sighed. “We’ll get your sister back in the morning.” Vader walked Luke to his room, before heading towards the bridge. He dismissed the officers from the bridge. He stood by the window and looked out over the Empire that he was stuck ruling. The presence he had felt in Leia’s room was back. It felt safe, warm, and comforting. He turned around and saw Padme standing behind him. Her hand crept up to his face. Her hand was soft.

“Oh Ani.” She whispered. “You’re back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this chapter! This one is much shorter than usual because I wanted to focus on Vader and Luke's relationship.


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